Term 1 is ending soon….tats super duper fast….
I seriously nid a break n i feel tat im being completely played arnd…lyk a fool…. Seriously nothing is goin thru smoothly…i seriously hate the society i standin with….i finally understand why deres ppl who juz wanna get off this place but leaving here juz bcos of that….i will b such an ignorant person…
I will be soo dumb to leave this place…..i have my lovely parents n frenz why do i have to care abtn the shittylee shit…
But the incidents that happen this few days,weeks,…totally wasnt awesome..somehow,some day it had step over my limit…but i chose not to rebutt..
Seriously am i doing the right fucking thing? Rebutt or not to rebutt?
All these idiot things happening at 1 go juz drivin me into madnessss….for the past 2-3days my head hurts lyk its goin burst anytime, when i walkin down a street i can feel i may just fall n lie flat on the ground… But who will noe?! Nobody even cares abt it..not onli the head the thoat too! Its killing me!
The mess uppys are creatures of attention and emotions! They only wanna show themselves,express every single ass abt dem but nvr u were given this chance to do it too..
I ever wondered why i was born a character lyk jy or zx? Naturally u can juz take a deep breath n u forgo it and end everything with a smile.
Living in another downturn….
being more meticulous, more over worried over others is that an awful thing? Why am i being shout for? Is u want the attention n i gave it? N u are juz treatin it for granted…i totally fustrated! U wanted we to show u we did care u oso treat “i lyk deserved it!” Bitch! Bastard!
Sometimes i juz feel that can u juz kill my tat bloody kind kind face/attitude/behaviour…n that “i do care” attitude…. Seriously, i can be a bloodly hell opposite attitude but i chose not to…why? U might ask…. I think being that is plainly 1 word cruel. Is lyk being a bully..how can i do tat??
I really need a refresher….prolly after a recharged i wont mull over such things when it happen…
P.S.: i typing it with my head stil hurting heavily! :(
Its been ages i post something on tumblr! OMG! I believe its mths ago i last use it!
Some updates of my life!
1) Shout “woohoo!!” cos my ITP-attachment is OVER!! hip hip hurray!!! 3 cheers for me! I finally ended that torturous 6 week journey of calling caLLING and CALLING!
2) School started and this week is WEEK no. 5!! and guess wat! PLS LET ME SAY THIS!! F*CK MY LIFE! F*UCK!! (in a bad n good way kays!!)
GOOD WAY- no MST, no EXAMS onli projects n end sem. tests (happie die me kays)
BAD WAY-my new grpmates for projects—> they are WAY more den a SUCH AN ASS! I really got 0% of luck in the first few weeks of sch….seriously that 2 freaks are being overly assholes! dun come to sch!! dun really give a damn abt projects! SHIT U B*STARD AND B*TCH! but den back to reality its life! haiz! curse and swear out of my ass doesnt help!
3) Driving lessons are going smoothly!! (AWESOME!!)
MY progress report: able to do bends almost goin to drive without my instuctor holding the steering wheel, Now the left pedal- Mr clutch is being so nice to me that he almost became my gd fren…but soon he will!! Gear-y is oso nice too towards me!! and I AM. 40% ready to be an AWESOME,FANTASTIC driver!!
4) Still crazy over RUNNING MAN!! but lately seldom watch cos super busy!! Although i watch the first few EP alr of running man but i still watch on Channel U!
5) I AM. overly crazy being obessed over JUMP! (跳浪) is not because of the cast kays!! The Reason: its filmed at PSS-Punggol Secondary School! My secondary school!! OMG!! Why didnt dey asked me to be part of the drama!!
6) pt 6- the pt whr i will vent my anger of some ass ppl. seriously! i really dun understand y these ppl cnt follow instructions and sooo indecsive! cnt they jus “yes” means “yes” and “no” means “no” i really fukcing hate these NE NE NE ppl! so weak weak soft soft! and whenever the decsive me makes a stand dey just kinda give me the buay song face! WTH den y dun u say something and persuade me to accept ur fucking idea. Seriously! I AM. restating this again! “I DUN OWE U A LIVING” PLS ppl!! reality check here!! pls do thing chop chop! dun sway here sway dere!! I dun have the time to be dere with u to sway!
7) Although i loved this sem but deres times i hate…..ROLE PLAY!! arhs!!
Kays enough of my updates…time to off my lappy! enjoy myself at coffee bean!! shaking my legs n doing projects and enjoy a cup of my fav.! PURE DOUBLE CHOCOLATE ICE BLENDED!
P.S. YAWNS!! Everyday in school is just plain enjoyment and fuck up at times! :)
Well,its sat!! n i started the day with my first lesson! Wow! I was fun nervous intense high coodination n etc etc! Many many feelings to describe to…..
I wonder hw i will go for the subquent lesson! I realli hope it will go well n i passed within 1 try!!
Besides, 2dae luck was nt bad aft all the bad things happen ~~
I went to catch toys again….hehe!! And guess wat?! 3 hello kitty! Whee!! Seriously?!!! I gt the trick of catchin kay!! Omg!! It was so SIMPLE! anybody wanna hello kitty!! Feel free to contact me n we go catch at PS!
PS: I ENJOY MY DRIVING! I JUZ HOPE I WILL DO WELL!! :)
Week 1 of my attachment is past….OMG!! 5 more weeks to endure…i dun noe whether i can make it anot…
This week started pretty great with some news which i can concentrate on so i dun tink too much abt
1. LO is coming to visit us!! Im sooo gonna complain TTM!!
2. Midin my besties!! Hw long i nvr c them liao!!
3.Exams results on nxt Tues!! OMG!!’
4. 1st practical lesson on comin sat xcited n nervous TTM!!
5. 2moro mummy gonna collect $88 gift card on behalf of me!! Shiok TTM!
5 great things in my mind…..temporary relieved from..STRE..SS!!
PS. I REALLY ASSLY HATE MY FUCKING ATTACHMENT!!!
Its 4th day for ITP alr n i stil nt liking the job….
I pretty stress out every single day over my grades and i was veri veri determined to do it well since day 1.
But i cnt seem to do it….. I really cnt! I cried almost everyday becos i just so stress out over the problem that i wont do well n affect my grades. I really not cut for this job. Seriously!.. I been through many different jobs i really know wat is suitable n wat is not…..many ppl may gt perhaps say is JUST a job y u dun try it out u nvr know whether it suit u anot…..but for me! U dun nid to tel me this!
For the past 2 yrs n poly…i have been thru many modules of different areas, i know wat kind of job im gd at and wat not… Seriously this ITP is totally nt my type! I feel no job satisfaction, no fufilment everyday. My life is so depress. Everyday, callin ppl to take up loans from banks. Are singaporeans so short of cash?!? I tink partly its mayb karma… I often reject such promotion/survey calls n dun even give them a chance to ask or promote….
Personally, i tink such calls are alr irritating to my ass n nw u expect me to call n irritate ppl n try to persuade ppl to take u the loan!! OMG! Really pain in my ass….
I takin a few jobs alr n i nvr ever felt so much stress…. The times in ICA, handling confidential files, doc up to 100~200 files daily probably even more stressful than this kind i am able to handle skillfully even my supervisor was impressed. At Robinsons, must handle $ n customer service esp credit cards! I oso can handle the stress. In SPELL same thing too.
I really cnt take it anymore, its probably internally in my heart n mind has a expectation…. I grow so old liao 18years old i grew with a expectation in life… N this time rnd i try to work with expectation but without my best skills with me. Thus, causin me to fall really very deep onto the ground……
I really packed with many skills but with the wrong ITP….. My skills were correctly applied to my previous jobs but nt this tme rnd……i really feel VERY DEPRESSED! lyk those tv show will show a depressed man everyday aft work standin at the mrt platform kept lookin down on the ground, with gloomy face…. I totally like tat every single fuckin day….
My mum sae me cryin n told me to tel my teacher in charge to change or just dun do besides wont affect grades rite….. But i just cnt let it my Grade be anything less than A…I really wan a DIST..i alr make a goal for it!… I dun wanna when i come out of soicety ppl ask me y u gt B only for ITP! I knew i have be abilty to work well! But i juz cnt in this job…FML!
I didnt wan my mum to tel becos i dun wanna let ppl c im weak, i wont just give up just bcos i CMI… I will finish till the end even i will gt depression! I nt i will regret….i dun wanna my life to live lyk a loser/ ban tu er fei. I wont let my life to live in regrets! No matter hw hard i will endure, I must walk till the end…. Just lyk in REDex! Full of bilster but no regrets in life…
BUT, I JUST NOT MEANT FOR IT….NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRY….
PS: I just won a $88 movie card from GV..but i 快乐不起来….. Depressed everyday :’(
Since the ITP posting came out, i had a premonition that the attachment job scope will nt be as satisfying as wat i dreamed for….
As i worked in ICA,ushering and robinsons before…i probably had the idea on wat i may wanna expect for ITP, as in wat job scope n working environment…. But when the postin were out…im lyk S.T.U.N.N.E.D…..fuck my life i would say…. Browsing thru the web getting info abt the company…i even wanna say wat hella shit i will be doin…cross fingers pls a wanna data entry….no quotas n anything else unless the quota type is lyk in ICA whr quota refers to no. of files done….which i preferred most….
Lyk the title as mentioned….my luck probably ran out due to EXAMS n didnt had the time to replenish as fast…..lady luck wasnt on my freaking side….
On a side note, 2 years in poly i alr know whr is my better biz area n what not….my dear frenz shld noe tourism n Ibiz are my passion which is oso wat i wanna pursue on…HRM n a/c is nevertheless wat im good at…finance…hmm idk yet (lets c hw aft result are out)
U know,i know…life is nvr ever smooth sailing lyk i hope to have…..for ITP i nid to do telemarketing….FML…tat i the last fuckin job i even wan to find….in case u dun noe i had struggles in marketing as well as in language but pian pian this ITP needs this.
Dun blame me i nervous, tense up, or wateva durin trainin 2dae….cos i know myself best…im nt cut out for the job. Besides im not an audio person i more of visual learners…u wan me to speak to answer the person on the spot…PLS u are askin my to dig my own grave….i rather die den speak unclearly n answer the customer…..
Seriously,i dun c the benefit of this company for me…is probably better for a marketing option student to join this company….lyk my counterpart for ITP. Shes taking marketing….
Haiz….i have to c hw is goes….6 weeks there FML…..
P.S. Life is in a downturn mode, FTT is in 1 mths time! Tsk :( 3
OmG i seriously damn freaking stress out! I realli hate exams! Summore the 1st exam is B LAW…i wanna vomit blood! I damn law now (in hokkien)….
I really hate law!! It jus so difficult noe it! Waste so much of my brain juice n cells!
I noe im wasted my dear study week on watch variety-RM but it just too tempting! Sumore i cnt study way that early..i cnt asborb!…yah yah i noe i ling shi bao 佛 jiao! But that hw i can totally asborb!…
Yah yah yah! I dumb to study last min….me zi tao ku chi….haiz wat to do…mydearbrain… Time for a change in study for the new yr!!
Urgh y do i have to be sick when exams are here?? * coughs coughs COUGHS* eeyer!! I feel so terrible!
I really nid a dearly BREAK…whenever i tink aft exams is ITP i totally wanna break myself into pieces…..i REALLY wanna go overseas! Rest a week or so from the hectic life in SG….
Driving is another thing a wanna clear this yr! omg! I hope i can pass everything in 1 shot! But ppl always say gals cnt! Tsk! So demoralizing! But i hope i can!! I shall be the exception! pray hArd
For nw I juz hope i can gt A’s for my exams…hopin my GPA can maintain or go up!
PS: i really need a getaway! :( suggestion pls! :(
I know Im TOO old to play this but just for the sake of childhood memories n the love for it…:) 3
My luck wasnt too bad!! I gt a “S” card- SUPER RARE card onli gt 7kind okay - LALA (LITTLE TWIN STARS) n a normal card MARGARET (HELLO KITTY’S GRANDMA- hehe if IM nt wrong!)
